Todays post is dedicated to......

MY TWIN :)

this boy is my best friend. my other half. my "womb dawg" haha! Everyone always asks me if i love being a twin. And my answer is always yes. I love it! Now of course we have our moment. But I have never once said i wish i didn't have a twin. I love sharing the light with him :) We are so much alike it's not even funny. We act like complete idiots...pretty much all the time. But i love how we are so comfortable around eachother. & we have always had the same friends. So we have always hung out in the same group of people. It's been really hard and weird being here at school without him. I hate it to be honest. I think one of the reasons why the transisition into college was so hard for me was because i didnt have him here with me. It's sucks. I feel like sometimes people here don't understand my craziness. But i knew if he was here with me he'd totally get it and be right there with me acting just as dumb. I miss the hell outta him when he isn't here. But i love going home and seeing him and getting the biggest hug in the world from him. He seriously is my best friend. We tell eachother pretty much anything. And if i ever need anything he is right there for me. One of my recent moments that just made me realize just how much he really does care for me was in early February. I was stayiing over at his house. And he walked by the room i was in and saw me laying on my bed just bawling my eyes out because i had just gotten my heart broken..like hardcore...and Max just came in there and laid down next to me and just told me everything was going to be alright. and he just let me cry. He's such a good man. And a wonderful person. The bond we have is something that i don't think very many siblings can say that they have. I love this kid to death. We have so many inside jokes together. and i can seriously go on and on and on about all the reason why i love being a twin and why i love max. I don't know where i would be with out him. I strongly believe that i am the person i am today because of him :) I love you bubba!

oh and did i mention we have incredible dance moves???

ignore the singing hahahahahahaha i was outta breath!!

well, i've been in bed pretty much all day, minus getting up and going to class. But thankfully i only had 3. Strep Throat just.....sucks! but it's whatever. Hopefully tomorrow will be a better day.

But being in bed gave me too much time to think. I haven't really had a day to just sit and think since the end of January. And i stayed busy for a reason. An then today. I got the chance to just think. lets just say....not the best thing.....Feelings & Problems that i thought i had moved on from. All came back to the surface today....Finally made me realize that i've been putting it in the back of my head and not really working on getting over stuff. Ya know just convincing myself i'm fine and it's over.....it's far from over.... AHHHH why do i do this to myself? I'm just being dumb. & it's my own fault for just laying in bed all day...(not my fault for getting sick thought lol ;) )
God will get me through this........*this too shall pass*
Anyways;
enough depressing/lame thoughts....how about something happy??

hmmmm......

I love Cierra & Noelley :)
thats a happy thought.
those are the 2 girls that are keeping me sane in this place! They are the 2 who are here for me no matter what. Sooooooo lucky to have them in my life!! i love you girls!! :)



goodnight.

another sleepless night....

What a weekend!

okay, i was so on edge all day friday. I wanted to get out of school and just be with my dad. I mean i know surgery went okay. I had talked to him on the phone and everything. But there is just something about actually seeing him in person that made me feel better about everything. Idk why i was so i'm not sure what the word i'm looking for here is....but it was like i couldn't think of anything else except for getting home. So i finally got home and saw him :) and immediately i felt better. We cuddled on the couch and watched the blindside (which by the way is an AMAZING movie) i love it! but anyways i was happy to see my dad :)

And then after spending some time with him, i finally got my laptop! which made me really happy. So that is a plus!

saturday i went to petsmart because they have puppies every saturday;

& i really want a puppy. So Abby, Whitney and I went to look. Little did i know i was going to fall in love :)

this little girl is just precious!

how could you not fall in love with this cute face?? lol

anyways;

Later on Saturday night Abby,Whitney,Tiffinary and I decided we were going to go on a little adventure...one of the kinds where you just get in the car and drive and see where it takes you, well we started this little shindig at umm 10:00 in the evening...and we drove, and drove, and drove. And stopped at different places a long the way...and the we got tired fo driving..and decided to head back home..lol...didn't get back to Whit's until 4:00 in the morning...then of course..we were all wide awake (for the most part) and i ended up not falling asleep until 5:00 or so. woke up at 8:00 to get ready for church...which was verrrrryyy hard to do. But i made it. lol. Sadly, i woke up and knew right away that i had strep throat. I couldn't swallow and i couldn't talke (i literally feel like i sound like man lol) but lets just say i felt like crap! So after church i went back home and crashed thinking i would feel better when i woke up...WRONG..lol but i had to drive back to school so i had to get up...i'm starting to feel better now, and hopefully will feel better tomorrow and not worse. So we will see.

Anyways. It's late. I'm tired. I may be able to fall asleep...who knows.

Goodnight.

Late Night Blog....

Too much on my mind.... i hate it when that happens, i can't sleep.

First and Foremost;

I'm so ready to know if i have gotten accepted into Johnson. The wait is practically killing me!!! I already have everything planned out, i already know who my roommate will be. and i love her to death! & i think it's going to be an awesome experience. I know a lot of people from that school. & i feel like i will be able to get connected better than what i did here at huntington..... But also, my mom (whom i love to death) has been asking me some pretty tough questions that are making me second guess myself (which i don't like AT ALL) but it's something i do need to face, Do i honestly think i can handle being 7 hours away from home? I think in time i will be. I feel like i need to get away and learn how to be independent on my own. Here at Huntington i'm only an hour away, and so my parents are always helping me out with things. which i really do appreciate. But i think it's time that i learn to handle situations on my own. Yes i'll miss them like crazy, i love my family. ALL of my family,& it's going to be a challange not being home. & my friends. I'm going to miss like crazy. & everyone at church as well. It's going to be a challange. But i feel like God will guide me through it. I'm ready for this challange. & i'm just praying that i hear something here within the next week so i can stop stressing myself out!!! lol

Another Thing.

This is just going to be a blog about school i guess. School is just stressing me out!! lol
I'm really just ready for this year to be over with!! I honestly just need to get out of here. I love the people..well most people..here..but..idk.. I feel like i'm suffocating. I don't feel happy. & i don't feel like i can be my total self either...I can only around like 2 people. Idk. It's probably just my being paranoid. But idk. I'm definately going to miss some people here don't get me wrong. It's going to be kind of a bittersweet thing once the school year is actually over. But idk. I'm tired of stressing myself out over all the homework and all that crap. I just need SUMMER!!!! Speaking of summer. I have high reguards that this summer will be the BEST!

Possible Job at Cedar Point with Noelle? hmmm... :)
& if not..then Bonfires,parties,friends & ROAD TRIPS! I'm ready! COME ON SUMMER!!!!


well i'm finally feeling tired. so i'm going to leave it at that :)


Goodnight!

We are going to Disney World...say what?!? :)

Yep thats right : ) My daddy came in the house the other day when i was home, and he said "guess what i did today?" and he then proceeded to tell me that he had made reservations at a hotel in disney world and that we are bringing in the year 2011 while in disney!!! & those of you who know me, know that disney world is my favorite place on this earth!!! I'm 19 years old and still freak out when i go there : ) So when my dad told me this new i practically had a heart attack! Let the Countdown begin! I'm stoked!

Anyways....

I can't tell you enough how thankful and blessed i am to have such amazing people in my life! The past couple of months have been pretty rough. Bad things just seemed to keep happening. It was like one hit after another. And it hasn't been easy. But i honestly don't think i would of gotten by without the people i have surrounding me. God has truely blessed me thats for sure!!

In other news, my daddy had surgery today, and praise God everything went well! One of the hard parts about being away in college is you don't get to go home whenever your family needs you, like in a situation like this. So it was hard for me to even think about anything else knowing that my dad was having surgery. But like i said Praise God! I'm such a daddy's girl :)


i believe this is all for now......

6 weeks!

a6 weeks left of this school....lets just say..i hope it goes by fast.
Yes i'm going to miss it, and some of the people here as well. but i'm ready to just move on!!


Spring Break is over, and it sucks. ha but i had a really really good week for several different reasons : ) it was good to spend time with family and friends again.The beginning of break wasn't all the great. Ha started out by working at camp..which I was okay about :) but not okay having to be outside in the pouring rain!! & then i realized i left my transfer infromation for school and a $700 check at school..so i had to leave work and go back to huntington. So i get in my car and leave and half way down the road my car dies. And it just kept dying. Ah i pretty much reached my breaking point at that moment. and my daddy came and he drove my car home for me..and it didn't die on him at all..i was sooo mad! like my car seriously hates me. it's a POS! i need a new one..but oh well i'm thankful that i atleast have one. But sunday Mandy went back to huntington with me..which was fun : ) the Majority of my time over spring break was spent at Mandy and Shane's house which i looooveed! because i got to see them and the 3 boys :) ah they complete my life! lol...butlike i said before it was nice to hang out with all my friends...& joey came home for a little bit too so it was nice to see him :)
This break definately had a lot of adventures though..which i enjoyed ;)
anyways i'm just being totally random.

Only 2 more weeks then it's easter break :) ha so i can count down to that!!

thats all for now :)

Spring Break!!!

Spring Break is finally here... & i couldn't be happier i dont think lol. i really just need to get away from school to be honest. There is just too much going on.

I'm not really doing too much over break, Monday possibly going to Chicago with my loveees :) and then towards the end of break i am going to Tennessee to see Joey!!! & also going on a college visit to Johnson Bible College. (If anyone who is reading this has been there, or knows anything about this school, i'd appreciate your input :) )

It's amazing how god works to be honest. I thought i had it all figured out. I honestly thought i would stay here at Huntington all 4 years. But through different situations i felt like i didn't need to be here, i felt like god was calling me somewhere else. So i started applying to other schools. I got accpeted into Ivy Tech, which isn't my first choice, but it was something, so i figured i'd get an apartment and go there for a year and do some Duel credits with another University. Well like i said God is funny and can sometimes just rock your world! I was doing my devotions the other day. and was reading in Jeremiah. And came to one of my favorite verses which is Jeremiah 29:11 which says " For i know the plans i have for you" declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you hope and a future" This verse blew my mind when i read it. Which is funny because i have read it so many times. But it really just hit me because i feel like i've been struggling so much with where i need to go in my life. I feel like i've been focusing so much on where I WANT to go, and not where i feel like god is calling me to go. So reading that made me realize that i have to give God the wheel and let him take control. So i prayed, and have been praying for God to direct me. And i just feel like God wants me to alteast look into Johnson, and go for a visit and give it a try. When i was reading and praying i just got a sudden feel of overwhelmness and excitement. An i just felt so ready to go. I've applied, got my transcript transferred, and my refrences getting their applications to fill out, I'm SO ready! It's all up to God now on weather or not i will be accpeted. But All i can do is pray, and those of you who are reading this, I hope that you will pray with me. :)

well thats all for now. I'll blog again next time i get a chance!

First blog? We will see how this goes.

So i've never really tried this whole blogging thing before. But i know a lot of people who are doing it. An i'm always on this website following peoples blogs anyways. And so i figured hey! why not give it a shot. So here i am. : ) I feel like blogging is kind of an easy way to get your thoughts and experiences out in the open. So maybe this is a good thing. who knows? Not sure how good i will be at updating, so bare with me! Thats all for now. I'll do an actual post later on. :)