What i'm thankful for..

With Thanksgiving tomorrow, it's made me think about what i'm truely thankful for. so this blog will tell you just that... so here we go.

I'm thankful for....




These wonderful men! My brothers, and my dad.

First off is Max,my twin, my other half. The one who gets me through my rough days. He is one crazy kid, and always has been. But i love him so much! he just makes every day brighter for me. We obviously have our ups and downs. But i honestly dont know where i would be with out him.

My dad. i don't even know where to begin. We are way too much a like, so we but heads often. But i wouldn't have it any other way. He's my rock. The man i've looked up to my whole life. The one who always gives me strength to keep going when i want to give up. He's my hero.

Jake. ohh jake. he picks on me more than anyone ever has. but im thankful for those moments. This picture was taken this past weekend...on his wedding day. It's hard to believe he is a married man now, but i'm so thankful he found such a wondeful women.

Then there is Joey. the one who i go to whenever i need advice. he is always there to lend an ear. and tell me when i'm making stupid decisons. He's getting ready to be a daddy to a beautiful baby girl, and there is no doubt in my mind that he is going to be a wonderful father.


Next is...




My beautiful mother:

I go to her for EVERYTHING. and that is not a lie. I love having a mom who i am comfortable talking to about anything. She is always there to help me when needed. & she is probably the funniest person i know. she is just crazy! but i love that about her. She inspires me so much. Most kids think to themselves "when i have kids i will not be like my mom" For the most part, i want to be like my mom. She's just amazing.


Next...
I'm thankful for..





My lovely grandparents!
They are just the cutest things! My grandma has a heart of gold. & i love her to death. My grandpa just makes my heart melt everytime i see him. We just have a connection that i think only him and i will ever be able to understand. :)

& last but...not least. is...




This handsome man. I've blogged so much about how much Derek means to me. But i don't think i can express enough how much i love him. He's truely shown me the way i need to be treated & i can't thank him enough for that. He's means everything to me. & i can't imagine not having him in my life :)


SO there we go, short & sweet & to the point. There are so many other things i'm thankful for. Random people in my life who have impacted my life in such a big way. but there is not enough time in the day to thank all of you....

& i can write 40 million pages on how thankful i am for God. because there is so much he has done for me it's unreal. <3

I hope everyone has a wonderful & safe thanksgiving.

November 8th.

8 years ago today, i remember my mom waking me up saying we need to talk to you in the living room. I walked out into the living room, where all of my brothers were sitting, and also waiting for my parents to talk to us. At first i thought it was going to be exciting news..like "we are going on vacation" or something like that. Then once i looked at my mom and saw she had tears in here eyes i quickly realized that i would not be getting exciting news...rather I'd be getting devastating news.My dad then proceeded to tell me that my grandpa harry had passed away. This was the first person i had ever lost that was very close to me. & i was in complete shock. I didn't know how to even handle it. Of course i cried. My parents told us that we needed to try our hardest to go to school. I was in 8th grade at the time. & i tried my hardest to stay. but i didn't even make it through homeroom, which was the very first class of the day. I went down to the office and told them what had happened. & they called my parents to come and pick me up. I went home, and i just remember crying all day, not being able to grasp what was going on. Thankfully i wasn't alone once i got home. My cousin Benji had also had to come home from school and he was staying at my house for the day. We sat back in my brothers room, and just talked about how we felt. How we couldn't believe he was gone. But also the fun memories we have had of him. The funeral was rough, but aren't all funerals? I just couldn't believe that someone who i had just spent time with earlier in the week, was taken away from me. Thankfully i have a wonderful family. We all helped each other get through this rough time.

It's still a painful day for me every year. Everything just plays back in my head. I just kind of want to fast forwards through this day every year. But at the same time i wish i could rewind back to this day 8 years ago. Well more like November 7th. I'd make the walk back to my grandpas house (who lived right behind me) I'd spend the day just telling him how much i love him , what a great man he was. How big of an influence he was on my life. I'd let him tell me stories like he always did. I used to hate hearing his stories because they drug on forever...but I'd give anything just to sit down and hear one more story of his.

One thing i do know, he that he was a christian man. It gives me hope that one day i will be able to see him again in Heaven. That's the only thought that gets me through this day every year. I will once again be reunited with him. & i can't wait!


I love you Grandpa Harry.

It's time to make a change...for REAL.

One thing that i've become guilty of my whole life, is having a poor body image. I literally HATE everything about my body. & if i talk to someone about it, they say "There has to be atleast 1 thing you like" & honestly, there isn't. I can pick out a million negatives, but i can't pick one positive. This has been a problem since i can remember. I can't think back to a time when i actually had a good body image. isn't that sad? But i don't want to have a pity party, i just think it's awful for me to do this. I'm almost 21, and it's time for me to make some serious changes, so i can finally start feelin good about myself.

I want to start working out everyday. I usually work out every couple of days. & then it turns into like once every week. Then turns into once a month. then...well never. So i need to have dedication to this. I need to work out everyday. Thankfully, Derek works out and is going to help me stay on track (hopefully ;) )

Also, eating healthier is a HUGE thing. I'm so busy with school & work. I don't live in muncie, so i don't really have a place to go to to eat, so it's just easy for me to just hit the drive-thru. & Obviously that's not the smart choice. So i need to make some big changes there.

I'm just tired of constantly feeling negative about myself. It's time to get serious. I don't want to end up being 40 & weighing 500 pounds. I'm too young to give up on myself already.

So if anyone out there has diet plans/ workout plans they wanna share. FEEL FREE! the more the better!

that is all.

<3